I've decided something. I would like Halloween a lot more if we could subtract the skulls, gore, and increasing number of scantily clad women. Personally, gore, skulls, demons, and the like disturb me. I can't even do scary movies. Now don't get me wrong, I love Halloween, but I prefer seeing cute pumpkins, happy witches, and Casper-like ghosts. Furthermore, why are all of the costumes available to females of all ages over thirteen hooker-esque? Costumes are meant for disguing, not revealing. Besides, it is my personal opinion that any young teenager should not be flaunting anything, even if there was the microscopic change she even had anything to flaunt. Anyway, what about all the modest, true disguise seeking costume lovers out there? Or what about the girls who feel insecure and can't even consider wearing the tight fitting pleather? Well, I think there are two options: one, make your own costumes, or two, eat these Butterscotch Blondies I made to make you feel better and then wear some ratty, torn up clothing used for outdoor work for your costume. Voila! A content bum. Or, pour red goop all over yourself (while wearing the ratty clothes), paint your face white or green with dark circles around your eyes, and commence moaning. Voila! A satisfied zombie. Satisfied because there is a "blondie" in the belly. (By the way, not all zombies are equal. Please don't be too gorey or scary (I don't care if you think that is the point of Halloween) because it will scare me. If you scare me, I won't share my blondies, so there.)
Speaking of Butterscotch Blondies, these are really delicious. I was rummaging through my freezer and discovered multiple bags of butterscotch chips and multiple bags of white chocolate chips. Though I was seriously craving something chocolatey, I persuaded myself that spending more money--that I don't have--was silly and I should use up what I already had. I argued for a little while, but then I came across this recipe and realized I was fated to use my butterscotch and white chocolate chips to make these bars. Let me tell you why these turned out better than expected. First of all, the recipe only uses brown sugar (as opposed to granulated sugar, or both). Because of this, the butterscotch is toned down by the molasses and isn't overpowering. I was afraid of biting into a bar that was basically one large butterscotch chip--way too potent--but my fears were for naught. The white chocolate chips (which is why we can call these bars blondies) added a nice creaminess to the treat, and complemented the not-too-potent butterscotch remarkably.
Recipe from Cookies & Cups
- 1/2 cup butter, melted
- 1 cup (dark) brown sugar, packed (If you don't have the dark brown, don't sweat it.)
- 3/4 cup butterscotch chips, melted
- 1 egg
- 2 teaspoon vanilla
- 1/2 teaspoon baking soda
- 1/2 teaspoon salt
- 1 1/2 cups flour
- 1 cup white chocolate chips
--Preheat your oven to 350°F.
--Line an 8x8 pan with foil or parchment paper. If using tin foil, spray lighlty over with cooking spray.
--In a medium bowl, combine baking soda, salt, and flour. Set aside.
--In your stand mixer, combine the brown sugar, egg, vanilla, and melted butter.
--On low speed, incorporate the melted butterscotch chips, stirring until smooth.
--Gradually add your flour mixture to the mixing bowl and stir until just combined.
--Add in the white chocolate chips, either by hand or by mixer. Incorporated evenly.
--Spread batter into the prepared pan, the texture will seem like cookie dough, and place in oven to bake for 20-25 minutes. Keep in mind ovens and pans varry, so you may even need to go longer than this, or shorter.
--Once golden brown and seemingly crispy, remove the bars from the oven and let cool for a little bit before cutting them into squares. If they happen to be underbaked (or intentionally doughy), cooling is especially important so the dough has time to set.
--Try to only eat one.